24 August 2009

Me

pitter.
patter.

the rain gently fell
she treaded the dim-lit avenue
gravity pulled raindrops gracefully from her umbrella
puddles gave her feet a tingling feeling

suddenly
a sudden rush of blood
a tight arm around her neck
drained every inch of energy within her

hand on the trigger
"give everything to me!"

she gave in

after what seemed to be years
she found herself alone
under the now-heavy rain
raindrops violently disturb her beautiful umbrella
shadows cover her earth
her feet shivers

she didn't
didn't
shed a tear

she walks slowly
her feet heavy on the ground
her pulse is quick
shaking violently
she is almost dying inside

sleepless nights.
brain-wrecks.
negativity.
denial.
hatred.
fear.
numbness.
HOME.

"give everything to Me."

hold back
then
let go

and she never
never
shed a tear

"now, i have every reason

to love

the rain."
____________________
24august09
i might have a reason to be afraid
but i have every reason not to.
i have THE reason not to.
-ara.janelle

19 August 2009

[tago]

huling nakita:
kasama ang mga kaibigan sa dyip
[paandar. paalis.]

sieteng pamasaheng dinukot
isang celfone na nahulog
[iglap...saklap!]

'sino? ano?' hindi nakakibo
nang makita ang nakahandusay doon
[bilis! takbo!]

isa lamang ang nasa isipan --
kailangang mailigtas, walang pero-pero
[kalma. gising...]

kailangan maging matatag
may panahon para ipakita ang naramdaman
[lapit. buntung-hininga.]

'gising lang a. wag matutulog.'
dahan-dahang naisambit
[nginig. pikit.]


mga tanong na di masagot ng deretso
mga taong nakiki-usyoso
katawang walang maramdaman kundi
ang malamig na semento at pawis sa noo
pusong bumibilis ang tibok sa bawat segundong...
...lumilipas

[nasaan? ano?]

dumating ang tulong
unti
unti


lumayo


...di na mapigilan ang nararamdaman

___________________
19august09
kailangan kong mapigilan ang naramdamang kaba..
takot..
hindi ko ito pwedeng ipakita..
para sa kapakanan niya.
ang hirap...
Kuya Kevin, pagaling ka na a!
-ara.janelle