28 August 2012

Morning reflections

The Lord has been good to me. He has always been.

For the past weeks, I have been worrying so much about every thing. It makes me sad, anxious, grumpy. As if every smile drains my energy. Then, I would blame God for everything I feel.

But, it was me who brought it to myself.

It was very disrespectful to blame a God who has always been merciful, gracious, and even just.

After all of the bad things I hurled at Him, punishments with great love and concern were what He threw back. Why would I be angry when He exacts punishment on my sinful acts and thoughts? He is just! That is what I deserve. I even should be dead by now. Thank God for His unending love and grace.

O Lord, let me be an instrument of Thy peace. I beg of you, please keep my thoughts and actions pure and holy. :)

*Good morning! It's a brand new day. A brand new start. Another chance to show the world who I really live for. :)

____________________
29aug12
A morning reflection and prayer :)

20 August 2012

Do I speak loudly in class?

Do I speak loudly in class? Yes, I believe I do. Being a musician, I know how to modulate my voice depending on the size of the room. I was trained to do that. I took it seriously because I am a choral singer, too.

The better question to ask is, “Do I always speak loudly in class?” Do I answer honestly in class or do I answer what my professors like to hear from me? My answer: No, I don’t always speak "loudly" in class. Usually, I don’t speak loudly in class when I know that my opinion or answer will cause a disturbance in the minds of those inside the classroom.

I experienced it so many times in the College of Music. When I did share my opinions or ask questions, I was usually shunned because what I said was not “in the book”. Thank the heavens, not all of my professors are like that. I encountered one professor who was always ready to hear his students’ questions and insights. If he doesn’t know the answer to my question, he would honestly say he is not sure what to answer. Then, he would encourage me to research about it and give the answer next meeting. That certain professor even defended me when I got a 5.0 in my solfege panel exam. He showed the panel my class performance. After doing so, he then talked to me and asked what happened. I told him I was so scared to fail. He told me it was normal, but he believed that I can survive the UP College of Music because I have the drive to do so. True enough, I am still in the College of Music.

I’m afraid (and SO TIRED) of professors not answering my questions and professors who even brand me as disrespectful when I ask a question they cannot answer. I don’t know why some professors get easily intimidated with their students. Some of my college professors caused a big issue in the college, which I will not disclose here, all because of students who asked “so many questions”. I thought UP professors are open-minded and had the best interest for students. Unfortunately, not all of them are like that. On the other hand, I am very grateful for professors who always want their students to learn and speak their mind freely.

I do not solely blame my professors for not always speaking loudly in class. I am a partly to blame because it is my decision not to always speak in class. When I think of something during the class, it shows in my face and my gestures, but not all are keen enough to see it or ask if I had something in mind that I would like to share.

I’m not sure if not speaking all that is in my mind is going against the UP student expectations. However, there should always be a balance between assertion and quiet pondering.

____________________
21aug2012
Reflection paper for my EDFD120 class. :)

10 August 2012

This is an educational autobiography for my EDFD120 subject. :D
hihi. enjoy :P

01 August 2012